Sunday, March 3, 2013

What a difference a day makes

It is amazing to me how one day can change everything in your life.  Not even a full day, but a moment from that day.  One little insignificant moment that turns out to be the most significant moment of your life.  My life was perfect.  Well maybe not perfect but pretty darn close.  I had a wonderful husband, 2 amazing kids, (1 boy, 1 girl, perfect), a home, Jesus, and the family and love I had always craved.  I also think that because my child had already battled cancer and we had that "scare" in our life I appreciated everything I had a little bit more. Saying I was happy and fulfilled would be an understatement.  I was rocking out being a mom.  Cooking, cleaning, teaching, etc.  My husband was happy and very satisfied.  Yup, a perfect life, that seems like a lifetime ago.  Then one day, one seemingly normal day, everything changed forever.  After that day nothing will ever be the same again.  At 9:01 pm, a Dr. called and told us Conner's routine MRI, that he had had several times since the first tumor diagnoses, showed growth.  My son in fact had cancer again.  So now, 4 years later I think back on this day.  This day that stole my perfect, fulfilled, life forever.  This day that I hate more than any other day.  Maybe even more than the day my son died. The day that I realized nothing in fact was perfect. The day that haunts me still in my dreams and lingers pain throughout my days.  This day that changed everything forever.